Today I make an apology to all my lady friends and readers whom I have rolled my eyes at as you’ve hobbled down the streets in pain due to your high heels!
Last week I participated in Walk A Mile in Her Shoes, a fundraiser for the YWCA, and squeezed into my very first pair of heels!
Obviously, the mathematic of jammeing 5 fat toes into 2 inches of point space seemed quite impossible at first, but eventually perseverance paid off, and this size 13 heel made its way over my tootsies.
The walk, which ended up only being a quarter mile, kicked off and I was out of the gate like a wild bull.. This was way easier than all the women that I’ve known have made it out to be!
Within 43 seconds my opinion changed and things started to go sideways….quickly.
43 seconds: blisters start to form.
1 :12 seconds: I have now lost 4 toenails
1:52 seconds: I can no longer feel anything below my ankle
2:14 seconds: dripping in sweat, I consider throwing myself into the public fountain
3:30 seconds: I catch my second wind, I break into a runway walk
3:32 seconds: a near ankle twist occurs, I escape falling by grabbing onto a 83 year old women for support
3:34 seconds: I start to limp and side shuffle
For the remainder of the torturous walk, I try to pinpoint exactly where the shooting pain is stemming from and fantasize about the moment when I would be peeling the now moulded heels off of my man feet.
At the end of the quarter mile walk, all pain aside, I was glad I was able to do something to support the YWCA, and thanks to my friends, family and readers I was able to donate over $700 to support their cause.
And of course, now I will never again point and judge a women in heels while she grimaces in pain.
I am now on your side!
Mr. Fab elleto